Are You a Proverbs 31 Woman?

In the church community "she" is the most prestigious within the church and something to aspire to. She is the one that her husband as well as children will praise; The Proverbs 31 woman. As a single woman I was most certain that I fit this mold, although her duties where well beyond what I hoped for. I has the opportunity to speak with Stephanie C. Harper, Author of " Married...Now What?". She will give us an complete examination of a Proverbs 31 woman and give us the answer we seek. "Are you a Proverbs 31 woman?"




 ♥     You believe singles should not get married to be happy" why would they want to get married if they wont be happy?

Just as money doesn't buy love.  Marriage is not an automatic fix for being happy.  Every day in a marriage is not a bed of roses.  You have two imperfect people trying to co-exist and it requires work.  Happiness comes from within.  If you are looking to someone else to "make you happy" then you will be disappointed a lot.  Bummer huh?  Marriage is a good thing, but you won't be happy when you have to pick up your husband's dirty socks 3 nights in a row.   The two of you can create happiness in your marriage, but just saying "I DO" doesn't create a happy marriage.

♥     How did you know that marriage was your ministry? 

Ha!  Actually, I never thought of it as "my ministry" as it relates to ministering to others.  However, I discovered in my own life that my because marriage is God-ordained marriage in itself is a ministry.  The dictionary defines marriage as a "service" or "function" and in a marriage you will find that a successful marriage requires us being selfless.  Which means that you sometimes have to put the needs of others before your own and that is not always an easy thing to do.

♥    In your book, Married, Now What? you said, "you can be a wife but not a proverbs 31 woman, but you cannot be proverbs 31 women until you are a wife", please elaborate on this revelation. 

There are many women who are married, but do not take care of their husbands or their homes.  There are many wives who also put there children before their mates.  But the Bible tells us to train them so they can what?  GOOOOOOO.  We were creates to be an asset to our husbands, not a liability.  The word help meet (helpmate) means that we are suitable FOR HIM.  Yes, we were made for him (our husbands). So our roles as wives is to keep him encouraged, keep him confident and keep him covered.  As for the latter part, you can be a Godly woman, but the Proverbs 31 status is reserved for a wife.  That doesn't go over well with many singles because they feel it's a put down.  It's not...but if they really study the passage of Proverbs 31 they will discover she is not just a woman of God, but she is a married woman. 

♥     If a single woman performs the duties of a proverbs wife, why can she not be a proverbs woman?  How can she perform the duties (of taken care of her husband) if she doesn't have one?

The Proverbs 31 Woman is married. The Bible is very specific when referring to her.  Vs 31:11 HER HUSBAND trusts her.  Vs. 31:23 HER HUSBAND is known in the gates.  Vs. 31:28 HER HUSBAND praises her.  Not only that if you start at Verse 1, that is a mother speaking to her son about how to choose a wife.  Let me also clarify, that I'm referring solely to the Proverbs 31 woman because the Proverbs 7 woman was a harlot.  *giggle*

♥     Would you say proverbs 31 is a letter to a man seeking a wife?

Yes.  Proverbs 31:1 is about a mother speaking to her son on how to choose a wife (Verses 1-9). 

♥     What would be your advice for singles preparing for marriage? Would understanding this passage be a prerequisite? 

Starting with your second question, understand the role of the Proverbs 31 woman would be quite helpful in determining how a woman should take care of her home.  At the end of the day, the woman is the aroma of the home and she has more power in the home that she thinks...but she has to learn how to create the aroma.  As for a single woman preparing for marriage, I would tell her to study the Proverbs 31 woman.  One misconception is that she was a housewife.  Now only did she take care of her husband and children, but she was also a polished business woman who made great contributions to her household.

♥     Would you do away with the list that most of us write in seeking a mate? 

I would not do away with it, but I would divide it down the middle of optional and deal breakers. Many times when women start sounding off their list much of it is superficial he must be this tall, this shade, have this much money, etc.  While those things are preferences, it might also be the list of things that keep women from being open to finding their mate (or should I say being found by their mate).

♥     In your book you stated “I don’t have to work as hard as I did when I was single”, is that a misconception?

Doesn’t being a wife come with additional tasks that singles are not privy to?  LOL, no I meant that in a literal sense.  When I was single, I worked 12 hours a day at my Corporate job and I also started a business and Magazine.  To build my business and get CAREER Magazine off the ground.  I needed the money from my Corporate position.  So I was literally working two jobs.  As a wife, I have a husband who pays all the bills (yes a blessing), so I'm not as hard pressed to work as long or hard because I don't have to bear all the responsibilities alone any longer.   I know have a partner who helps me with everything...even the common cold.

♥     When the process does begin as a proverbs 31 woman? Can it begin in singlehood? 

Good question!  I think you can prepare yourself to be wife while you are single by doing things such managing your finances, keeping a house clean (especially your bedroom...that's the king's playpen), never running out of things such as bath soap and toilet paper, learning balance, and learning to pre-plan for meals.  Personally, I'm a crock potter.  I clean and season my meat before I freeze it.  So even if I have to travel, my husband can walk to the freezer and drop meat in the crock pot and go to work.  While I may not be there physically, my presence is still there! :)  However, as I always say, "if you have never tasted a strawberry, you can't describe its taste".  So there are somethings that you will not learn about being a wife until you become one.

*Stephanie C. Harper, PHR, CCP, CHRM is certified human resources professional by trade. With more than 20 years in the industry, Stephanie is an author of 9 books, career expert, speaker, radio host and Publisher of CAREER Magazine. To find out more about Stephanie visit www.StephanieHarper.com

13 Things in 2013

1.  Jesus Christ had 12 disciples, he was the 13th!!!
2.  Its represents the Trinity 1:3..the Father, Son and Holy Spirit in 1
3.  The number that cleans and purifies
4. The number 13 brings the test, the suffering and the death. It symbolizes the death to the matter or to oneself and the birth to the Spirit (Supernatural): the passage on a higher level of existence.
5. Represents the eternal love illustrated by Jacob and his twelve sons. 
6.    We find often the number thirteen associated with the Blessed Virgin Mary
7. The thirteen gates of the human body of the woman: 2 eyes, 2 ears, 2 nostrils, the mouth, 2 breasts, the navel, the anus, the urethra and the vagina.
8. Number in relation with the moon: it covers on the average thirteen degrees per day and there are thirteen lunation’s in the year.
9.   The Number 13 is a Karmic Number.  Number 13 is the number of upheaval, so that new ground can be broken.  The number 13 has great power.  If this power is used for selfish purposes it leads to destruction.
10.  The U.S started with 13 colonies, the first national flag had 13 stars, and even today it still has 13 stripes.
11.  On the green side of the dollar bill there are 13 steps in the pyramid of the Great Seal.
12.  Tribes of Israel. Yes, 13. They consist of the eleven sons of Jacob/Israel and the two sons of Joseph comprising the original 13 Tribes of Israel.
13.  Most importantly, I was born 10.13…=)

Makeover: Whats in Your Closet?

^{How you dress on the outside oftentimes depicts how you feel on the inside.  These clothes became a metaphor of what I wanted my future to look like. I did not want to wear anything that was ill fitting in my past. . So I began to look deeper. What is your closet?}

^{♥A couple of bridesmaids dresses:...lol...Don't judge me. Why did I still have these dresses? Where was I going to where them next? Is it the idea of me being a single woman and participating in a wedding? Maybe that was what I was holding on to, but in the interim these dresses (oh, and bouquets), have no purpose. So in your closet are you holding onto some things, memories or people that have no purpose? Get rid of it.}

<sup>♥Broken shoes: I figure I can fix them, but I haven't gotten around to it or I can replace them for a better pair of shoes which I have many times. Coincidentally, it’s something about these shoes.  In many cases if I do pay to replace these shoes, the cost will be more than the original shoe cost that I don't want to pay. If I try to walk in them I would cause more injury, but at one time I loved theses shoes so much. What do I do?  Some things have a shelf life and will never be fixed. Its best to let them go, yes them. They are no longer useful in your "walk".

♥Clothes that are out of season: Last season I was able to wear sundresses but its winter in Chicago, if I try to adorn a sundress I would look completely ridiculous and the dress would not be functional. Maybe in the last season you needed the friendship because you were in a season of winter but when it got hot (or you began to go through the fire) you had to peel some layers off, it would be too much for your journey and you would overheat and become dehydrated. Some friends can be seasonal, maybe this is not there season maybe they are better suited for spring or fall. Sort them appropriately so that YOU know their season

♥Old purses: Some of which I don't carry and some which are out of date. I'm still trying to figure this out. When I look at my closet they look good there but its nothing in them. I honestly believe that they have not retained their value. There is nothing that I can give or receive from them, but once again they look good on the shelf. You may find that you have things in your life like this that you accumulated with no value taking up space. You cannot get the ones you want or need because something is in its space. This and empty bag, dead weight and the bible says lay aside every weight.

♥The too small or too big jeans... These jeans to me are self-doubt and fear. Don't get me wrong, having a safety net is good but when it leads you back to old habits and prevents you from going forward it is not a good route to take. What if you didn't have a pair of jeans to fall back on?  You would definitely make a way to change your bad habits to good habits.  Fear stops you from moving forward and leads you to a dead end or Egypt.   I want to encourage you today to clean out your closet, take out what doesn't belong there. Get rid of anything the can and will injure you, doesn't fit you, what serves no purpose, what will hinder you and what would cause fear in you. Come into the new year with a made up mind, a new purpose, a new focus and clean out your closet!!!!♥♥♥♥♥</sup>

 

Evangelism 101

Its not the destination, its the journey..I think I may have heard this somewhere but maybe not.  We all have somewhere or someplace to go and its important that we get there. Many of us would just like to reach our destination but what do you do while you are enroute. I love to drive, I think....;), just the other day in the middle of December in Chicago I saw a red robin and it was beautiful and breathtaking. It was also a reminder of how present God is in our life. I decided to research the red robin and it meaning and its symbolism represents joy, clarity, hope, renewal, rejuvenation, happiness and new beginining.  Strangely enough it also represents spring and warmth..Winter hasnt started yet.  I say this to say that GOD operates in wherever and whenever He likes. The red robin has a desitnation and I know for sure along the way he sent me a message in his journey. He never spoke a word but it ministered to me as it is ministering to you.
Much like this red robin who are you ministering to as you hurry off to your destination. Interesting enough I didnt have a face to face encourter with Mr. Robin to feel his presence or to know that God was with him. How do you respresent to the body of Christ? Has it become a testiment in how you live and how you present  yourselves to others. How do you spread the Word? At times we want to appear or be "deep" to reach the masses but be aware even Jesus came down amongst His people, and His life became a testimony to all. Do you speak to others? Do you smile at your brother? Do you have road rage? Do you stand in line at the grocery store waiting impatiently with a "Living for Christ" T-shirt on? Do you bash your brother? How does your light show? I do you know you are living for Chirst, Matthew 5:14-16 (MSG) says “Here’s another way to put it: You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We’re going public with this, as public as a city on a hill. If I make you light-bearers, you don’t think I’m going to hide you under a bucket, do you? I’m putting you on a light stand. Now that I’ve put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand—shine! Keep open house; be generous with your lives. By opening up to others, you’ll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven.
What to do next ?

• Take one step forward...smile.
• Extend your arm to hold a door for someone.
• Bake something and share, its been many times and Ive been hungry and someone feed me; I was able to testify.
• Compliment someone.
• Show and share love

This is where ministry begins and as always..Spread the God News

Spreading the God News

Are you about this Life? I have been living a saved life for years and I have never been bored. There is no doubt that He comes so that you may live life more abundantly.  Without a doubt there are ups and downs but I would not change my walk or life for anything. In this blog, I hope that I can show you how to L.I.V.E.!!!! Being saved does not mean that you cannot enjoy life and I will show you an account on how as a Christian you can live purposely.
Is the Gospel Glamorous, maybe.  Is it fabulous, could be? Are you royalty? But of course you are!!! This blog has 4 categories, Fashion, Shoes (So bad they are sinful), fragrances, and the Spirit World which contains up and coming events when living a saved and satisfied life. If you do not have anything to do, or you are bored in the Lord, stop by so that we can encourage you in to fellowship or your saved walk. Speaking of walking, whats the lastest in Shoe Business, and what can I wear to church?.. and we can also visit what not to wear..to church..=).
Lets show the world that living as Saints does not mean we can not seize the day. We have our our way, our own fashion.. our own "WALK"!!! After all, we can be in the world but not of the world and all because you're Holy does not mean you have to be homely.
Gospel Glam